Saturday, 18 April 2009

Au Revoir

In comments on my last blog entry, Matt asks me if I am still on CR.

I said quite breezily, oh yes.

But I think I probably need to say again that I don't do CR properly. I eat lightly naturally; my diet is mostly veggies, fruit, low or non-fat yoghurt, and cheese. I have cycles with what I want to eat and sometimes that means more grains and some times it means more fruit and sometimes it means all I want to eat is broccoli. Purple sprouting or just plain calabrese. Mmm.

But the CR label, especially with all this new Oprah generated interest on the CR lists, is not one I want to have. Of course I want a long and healthy life. I also want one free of worry and stress, and I have a temperament that puts me in danger of obsession and guilt. I read postings on the CR and CR Community Lists and (with no offence meant) it depresses me. Life is too short for so many worries about means of sustenance. Life is too short anyway. I have lost too many people in the two short years I have been blogging to... well, I guess I have to put my eggs into the basket of my genes rather than those of 50 years of controlled, deliberate eating. Not that my eating will be anything other than controlled or deliberate, but that is Sara. And not CR.

Hell, does that make sense?

Love to all,


Nenette AM said...

That makes perfect sense, Sara! And you've put into words what I'd been feeling the months before I officially declared the end of my CR practice last year.
I know too well the obsession and guilt that you mentioned.

I'm back to CR-ish eating, but avoid the calorie-counting and what I would consider over-restricting. It was too hard. I'm trying to eat well, in small portions, and if I have a pizza with my kids, the world won't end.

I hope you still blog. Even if it isn't about CR. I enjoy reading about what you're up to, what you're thinking, and yes, what you eat. :)


Ali said...

Hi Sara! The CR lists depressed me. I would read them for a bit, then unsubscribe because it was just too much to think about. I have said before that I wonder whether all this counting and obsessing has ruined some part of eating for me. I try to restrict my calories when I can, but I'm not CR'd anymore and I think that might be better in the end just because it allows me to give myself a break.

Amy said...

I agree. As much as they claim they aren't obsessed, I'm afraid they seem, well, obsessed. I find that if I get to where I'm trying too hard to be perfect, then when I'm not perfect I'm WAY more likely to completely dive off in the opposite direction (I'm an all or nothing personality, which isn't good, but at least I recognize it!).

Here's to healthy eating, without the stress!

Matthew said...

I just think you're thinking about what you define an obsession to be. We can argue that everyone has some sort of obsession no matter what their lifestyle.

I'm a little confused to exactly what is hard about a CRON lifestyle, and why are people thinking they themselves or others are obsessed with this lifestyle. At the start there is a learning curve and you have to know the important things to get on track. After a while you should just do things more naturally, and not have these constant thoughts at the back of your mind. I now wake up, literally takes SECONDS to weigh out the ingredients and i'm eating like any other 'normal' person, only that I just weighed the food. Now is weighing my food obsessive? Maybe, is it ruining my life? NO! ( LOL ).

I think one can try and convince themselves they're becoming obsessive when if you take a look at people with obsessive disorders they're quite different, and their behaviour is having some negative effect on their health and life.

After a while CR should be natural, there should be NO STRESS at all involved in anything. Neither should there be guilt, I mean seriously, guilt about what exactly? To me anyway it doesn't make much sense. If I ate almost half a bar of lindt dark chocolate like I did the other day, do you think I freaked out? No, I never even gave it a second thought until I just wrote about it this very second.

I think people might be making it stressful for themselves, when it really doesn't have to be.

I also hate these words of 'cheating' and its just the wrong way to view things. Totally the wrong attitude and will only lead to guilt and failure.

Sara said...

But you didn't just weigh the food, did you? You weighed it; entered those measurements into CoM; made sure that your day's nutrition came within pre-defined calorific and nutrional parameters... and that works for you, and that's great. And it worked for me, for a time as well. But it doesn't now. That's not to say that I'm not calorie restricted, and not to say that my diet is not super-healthy. However, if I am not tracking my calories and nutrition I cannot say I am practicing CRON, and if (according to one posting on the CR lists the other week) I am not continually losing weight then I cannot really be practicing true CR either. (I must have misunderstood the sense behind that comment because it makes none to me but that's by the by).

Food can be a messy, emotive issue for a lot of people, including me. And it can involve guilt and freaking out over consumption of chocolate and cheese. And it is a simple, clean-cut issue for a lot of people, including you, when chocolate and cheese just don't matter because it all balances out in the end and the fact that it might is incomprehensible. I'm not going to open that can of worms here. :-)

Ultimately one has to do what works for them, and that is what I was trying to say in this post, what I am doing now. No offence was meant, nor any criticism of anyone.

Linda said...

Hi Sara - I hope you don't stop blogging as I always enjoy reading your observations and you have such a beautiful writing style! We all do CR in a different way, and I know the ultimate hard line is to weigh and measure everything, and many people are OK with that. I have always regarded food as a pleasure, putting food on the table is an expression of love. But I have realised that over-feeding is misguided love, so now I give my best beloved delicious healthy food. I am sure you eat more healthily than 95% of the population and if nothing else CR has given you this. I am far from perfect in my CR practice but I am measurably healthier and far happier than I was before and that is the thing that counts.

Arturo said...

hi Sara
first, hello. i've been living in China the last four months. i stay in touch with my yoga blogging buddies, but i haven't visited the CRONie blogs too often. reaching blogs is not easy from here.

i would say that i'm practicing CRON more or less like you. i have the challenge of having everything in a different language and characters that i still don't understand. so for me, eating more or less the way i used to in SF is key, as well as weighing myself daily and keeping my yoga practice. i do enter food into COM, but it's at best estimates, so there is a margin of error. it does help me keep on track. if i stray, i'm more careful the next day.

i didn't know that Oprah became interested in the lists. is that really true? that would help a lot of people, though. you know, i don't get depressed from the lists. on the contrary, now that i'm in a foreign country i find more support there than ever. also, reading it helps me to stay on track. when i see newbies asking the same questions we've asked, it helps a lot. and people have been quite cordial even when not agreeing on things. so to me they are a resource and i'm not saying that in their defense, but to explain how i feel about them.

big hug, (and group hug to old friends commenting)